In the old country I was oppressed by communism, but here in America anyone willing to work can own their own business. I have put in many hours and made many sacrifices to make real my dream of selling dongs. I started with just a little dong cart and today I have a full sized dong supermarket! Although the work is hard and the hours are long, the look on a customer's face when I present her with the freshest dong in town makes it all worthwhile.
Editor's note: Even I am appalled at the lengths I will go to for a dick joke.